Confessions of a Bad Speller

Every once in a while I do things out of obligation…really being bullied into it by various influences, but mostly the internet.

God damn the internet. It has got me to do more things I end up regretting than alcohol. 

Doctor Who (that’s right, come get me)
Doom Metal
and More Anime shows than I care to admit…

SCOTT PILGRIM is just one more thing on the list. Thrust upon me by so many rabid fans until finally I got the point where I threw up my arms in submission and threw this DVD on my Netflix cue to let fester like the forgotten lunch in the back of my high school locker.

It became buried under more important things, piles upon piles of things, and was eventually forgotten. Finally, Graduation day came and time came to clean everything out. One by one I took things off the top of the pile, not really taking notice of what was underneath, nor preparing for it. Instead I just let things pop up unexpectedly until finally I hit the bottom of the barrel…the petrified gym shorts (SPEED RACER), that old comic book that’s now crumpled beyond recognition (PUSS IN BOOTS,) and of course…the forgotten lunch that I didn’t want in the first place by was forced upon me anyways (SCOTT PILGRIM.)

My avoidance didn’t just stem from the movie being forced upon me…

I can’t stand manga and anime anymore. I really can’t. There, I said it. Chastise me if you must, but goddammit does the stuff repulse me.

Anyways…I’m getting off topic. The point being I really wasn’t looking forward to this movie. But dammit, it surprised me. Sure it’s not fantastic, but at the same time it’s intriguing. 

The visual style is what has me most intrigued. Everything else…meh. I dunno, it seems waaaaaaaaay too hipster for me. Quirky…perhaps a bit too quirky. The best way I can describe it is GARDEN STATE meets Joss Wheden…but only a little bit of the latter and a whole heap of the former.

This makes for a veeeeeeeeeery slow movie, with lots of awkward moments where you’re not really sure whether you’re supposed to be laughing or not.

Then there’s Michael Cera…he just sucks. He really does…but having never seen ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT, I never was a big fan of his to begin with.

The thing that’s frustrating is that I love character exposition…when it’s done well. This is not what I would call good character exposition. Perhaps something was lost in translation from the novel to the movie. I don’t know, I’ve never actually read them. 

But I’m sure there are people screaming at me that I’m over analyzing this movie. Maybe I am…but hell, I’m not saying I hate the movie. I don’t…I just don’t think it’s as good as everyone said it was. Which is ultimately the result of everything I’ve been pressured into watching.

GURREN LAGAAN (or however the hell you spell it) was nothing special…
PANTY AND STOCKING tried too hard…
and DR WHO…just wasn’t my thing, so sue me.

As for SCOTT PILGRIM, it’s flawed, but intriguing. I’d be interested in reading the graphic novels at some point. Perhaps not anytime soon…but no worries, it won’t be another thing lost in the depths of my figurative high school locker. 

Bored as fuck…what is it about plans falling through that sends me for a loop? It’s like my brain shuts down and won’t allow me to think of anything.

At first I’m like…ok, that’s cool. I’ll just chill and allow my muscles to relax, watch a movie or something.

*watches SCOTT PILGRIM*

Ugh…that was an hour longer than it needed to be. What time is it? WHAT??!! ONLY 7PM???

The fuck am I going to do now?

Um…

….

..

….

Looks like a shower, Netflix, and an early bedtime is my best option.

I started seriously working out with my friend this week. My wimpy old regiment was cast aside for a far more intense work out…something that will actually get me results. 

Here’s the current schedule setup:

MONDAY - Shoulder’s and Light Benching
WEDNESDAY - Dead Lifts, Shrugs, Pull Ups, and Curls
FRIDAY - Heavy Benching

I’ve been through the first few days and can feel a big difference. I can actually feel the burn the day after. Sure I’m sore as hell, but at least I know what I’m doing is actually having an effect, unlike my old regiment.

I’m anxious to start seeing some results…but I’m realistic, I know it’s going to take a while. Still, I can’t help myself. The fat guy in me is totally stoked at the idea of being jacked as hell. I know it’s somewhat shallow…but I like having a positive self-image. I don’t think that’s such a bad thing to have. Besides…I’ve always had weak body strength, I’d like to actually be at a point in my life where I can consider myself even somewhat strong. More vanity…but it’s important to me for some reason.

I dunno. I’d be lying if I said that I wasn’t also thinking about the implications this could have for my romantic life. Although it runs the risk of my attracting more shallow women…

This whole thing is a double edged sword that I have yet to figure out how to handle. 

While I’ll have a better self image…I run the risk of becoming an arrogant prick.
While I’m getting more exercise…I’m sore most of the time.
While weight gain powder will help with my results…it’s expensive.

The most former is my biggest worry. In fact, it’s something I’ve been struggling with since I’ve lost my weight. I’ve been walking the fine line between allowing myself to be proud of my hard work, and bragging without even knowing it.

Or I could be over-thinking things…which I have an abundant tendency of doing. Who knows…

Never mind me, just rambling.

Most of the things I do in life boil down to this single reason…”because it’s funny.”

Why do you own a copy of the DOOM movie? 
Why do you insist on making horrible word puns?

Take today for further example. Why did I buy a beer named “Hebrewed?”
…because it was funny, and yes, that was the only reason I needed to buy it. 

I like to consider myself pretty darn masculine…

I own power tools…
I do my own auto repair…
My fingernails are always dirty…
And when something breaks, my first instinct is to crack her open and see if’n I can fix it…

But when I see a snake skin in my tool shed that’s longer than my arm…that’s the last time I’ll step foot near it for quite some time.

It’s definitely a night to break out my special set of pajamas my parents gave me…

Not really, but kinda.

I really wanted to like this movie. It was everything I’ve wanted in a modern horror film. Slow paced, a traditional old-fashioned “ghost story,” a haunted house, all set in the victorian era.

Sadly, this movie falls flat on it’s face all thanks to that plague upon all Hollywood films…the dreaded, the evil, the insidious…”studio notes.”

You could see the good movie in this…it shone through the mountains of studio notes that called for cheap scares, fake outs, and other such horror movie cliches. I’m just glad they stopped short of the “he’s the kid” plot twist that could have very easily been done. Thankfully, that wasn’t the case.

Also the ending is very clunky and anti-climactic…but other than that, all problems with this movie could be stemmed from studio notes. It had a neat setting, the look and feel was spot on, and once you realized that you weren’t getting some retarded plot twist, you were genuinely interested in what was going on with the ghost. 

But, I’ve ignored the gorilla in the room for long enough. Let’s talk Daniel Radcliffe. 

He was actually quite good in this, a bit bland, but that was due to his character. But the best part was the fact that my brain wasn’t screaming HARRY POTTER with every scene. In fact, I’m proud to say that during the entire hour and thirty five minutes of this movie, I only made a single Harry Potter joke. And quite frankly, when you are able to dodge such a strong potential for type cast…you ought to be commended. So, bravo to you Daniel.

…I suppose it helps I don’t give a flying f*ck about Harry Potter, and that the last one I saw was ORDER OF THE EMO WIZARDS, or was it ORDER OF THE PHEONIX? I can’t remember, it was a long time ago. The point being, Harry Potter ain’t my cup-o-tea, so that probably contributed to Daniel’s ability to transcend typecast. 

This is going to be a short review, but really, there isn’t much else to say about the movie. It’s bland, it’s weird, and very forgettable. But hey, at least it’s better than DON’T BE AFRAID OF THE DARK…*shudders*

Saw a meme where the characters from the last movie you watched fight the characters from the last TV show you watched…

As much as I love the Mythbusters, I doubt they could hold their own against the “Black Sand Clan” from Ninja Assassin.

Looking at my Transformers collection, I’m noticing places where I can significantly trim the fat. Whether it be pieces that I no longer am interested in, or figures that I bought on a whim and they never really did it for me to begin with, I’ve got a lot of things that can go. 

I’ve yet to decide how I want to do it exactly. While I’m slowing down significantly on the whole Transformers thing in general (Prime just aint doing it for me) there are a few pieces from previous lines that I wouldn’t mind having, so trades are always an option, but cash is always nice too. I’ll let you know what I decide, anyways, here’s a short list of items by line I’m thinking about getting rid of…

A/E/C

• Armada Deluxe Class Hot Shot
• Energon Deluxe Class Towline (Weapon Missing Radar Dish)
• Energon Deluxe Class Hot Rodimus (No Weapon)

MARVEL CROSSOVERS

• Venom
• Wolverine
• Captain America
• Hulk (Tank)
• Spiderman (Helecopter from 2 pack)
• Iron Man (Plane from 2 pack)

MOVIE LINE

• FAB Frenzy
• MOVIE 1 Deluxe Class Arcee
• MOVIE 1 Deluxe Class Dropkick
• MOVIE 1 Deluxe Class Payload
• ROTF Scout Class Ejector
• ROTF Scout Class Hubcap
• ROTF Deluxe Class Dirge
• ROTF Deluxe Class Cromia
• ROTF Deluxe Class Arcee
• ROTF Deluxe Class Mudflap
• ROTF Deluxe Class Skids

TRANSFORMERS (2010)

• Deluxe Class Terradive

…I’m also thinking about getting rid of the few KRE-O sets I have too, I only really wanted them for the little Kre-on dudes…but as I can imagine that’s the same reason other people bought the sets, I can’t imagine much luck getting rid of them minus the Kre-ons. We’ll see how it goes.

If anyone is at all interested in trades or anything feel free to send me a message. There’s very little I’m actually interested in trading for, mostly because all I really want is a ROTF Bruticus set for my FP Munitioner and Explorer…and I don’t see anyone trading me that for anything on this list.